If that hurricane hits on Friday and my flight to...
I’m gonna get puke ass drunk at JFK. Mark my words.
15 Minutes Into The Real Housewives of New Jersey...
And it’s already the most glorious piece of television I have ever seen. Fuck you, I am not ashamed.
I'm Going To Italy On Friday
You’re so jelly.
The Emmys Are More Exciting Than Mad Men
Listen to 'Shut Up, Weirdo' for Aug. 27, 2010 →
Topic was originally slated to be about dating, but ended up being about having sex with animals. What? It’s perfectly normal, just a regular ol’ day at Shut Up, Weirdo!
I Finally Had A Slice From Artichoke Pizza
Fucking disgusting. I will no longer associate with people who like that shit—there is something wrong with them, their taste buds and their morals. Also, I ate the entire thing.
Once Upon A Time In A Magical Land of Ice Cream...
This was Jessica Simpson.
Dudes Who Ride Longboards Are Pussies
I Had A Dream That I Had A Threesome With Marion...
And when everything was said and done, she got up and threw us each a cigarette and said “that was delicious” with her awesome little french accent. It was so damn hot.
I Have A Confession To Make
I’m in love with Mike “The Situation”. He has a player exterior, but he’s so damn sweet on the inside.
Friday on Shut Up, Weirdo: The Dating Show
Tips? Advice? What are your ice breakers? What’s the first question you ask? How can you tell if they’re cool? How can you tell if it’s goin nowhere? What are the warning signs? Is it the nervous twitch? The way he picks his nose in public? Call us on the air from 6 to 7PM at 201-209-9368 and listen in at wfmu.org or on an actual radio at 91.1FM. Shut Up, Weirdo: The man can’t bust our chit...
You’re a stripper wearing reading glasses.– John Mayer to the Huffington Post
11 Most Scandalous Saved by the Bell Revelations... →
I’m mortified at the thought that people could be looking at me naked before I...– Heidi Montag on Spencer Pratt selling their supposed sex tape.
One Problem With The Bus
Other people’s cell phone conversations. Previously.
I'm A Bad Little Blogger
But at least I’m self aware.
Today Only! Shop Vena Cava for Aqua + Free...
Get it here first!
Holy Shit I Love This →
Glenn Beck calls Rick Sanchez “the dumbest man on television” and then they proceed to laugh their asses off at Sanchez’s most retarded clips. So good. Not that I’m into Glenn Beck or anything, I just really really really hate Rick Sanchez.
An old man with a limp
Who went all the way to the Trader Joe’s in the city was on his way home to Jersey with his bag of groceries. Right as he walked out of the Path train station, the bag broke and ALL of his groceries fell on the floor. Glass shattering and all. I want to cry.
OUTRAGE OVER PLANS TO BUILD LIBRARY NEXT TO SARAH... →
From thedailymash.co.uk, Some sort of Anglo-Onion. (via inadvisable)
As per a coworker's suggestion, I've started...
And you have no idea what a difference it has made in my life. Now that I no longer have to go underground and wait 20 minutes for a subway, in 100 degree heat, while wearing a dress and heels, my mood is exponentially better. My morning now consists of grabbing a coffee right in front of the bus stop, waiting for the bus for a few minutes at most, in the sunshine, scoring one of those nice...
Guys are douchebags. They don’t know how to deal with women, and I feel...– My girl Snooki
Ethniticity– Danielle Staub trying to use the word ethnicity. And if you ask me, it’s reason enough for being fired.
My neck still fucking hurts.
Friday on Shut Up, Weirdo: In The Year 2525
Greetings, my friend. This week on Shut Up, Weirdo we ask you, the listener, to look deep, deep into your crystal ball and tell us what the future holds 500 years (or more) from now. We want to hear the full shocking story of what may happen some fateful day far far far away from today. Chrononauts welcome. Holo-phone us on the air (201-209-9368) this Friday from 6 to 7pm (EST Earth Time) ...
Best Thai in The East Village →
When I Post Two Daily Doses of Moss in a Row I...
And then I remember I don’t give a fuck.
Angelina Jolie Needs a New Fucking Hairstylist
My Neck Still Hurts
Tonight’s painkiller of choice: Klonopin