April 2010
Listen to 'Shut Up, Weirdo' for 4/16/10 →
wfmu.org
Topic: Prized Possessions (via shutupweirdo)
“Your ego is not your amigo.”
—Some dude on the TV
Jersey Shore Hos Get a Makeover
The Jersey Shore chicks get a makeover in the latest issue of Harper’s Bazaar. Who knew Sammi was so beautiful (far right)? Too bad she’s also the most insane of the three. (via Buzzsugar)
Hey National Guard people with giant guns on the 6 train
I don’t know, maybe it’s me, but it seems like morning rush hour in NYC maybe isn’t the best time to train your killer dog on how to fetch grenades.
“I’m very excited for you…Enjoy it and be good to people.”
—My Mom on my promotion.
My orange flavored Metamucil is like liquid candy.
Except good for me.
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“You’ve seen one, you’ve seen ‘em all.”
—My friends Mom talking about dick.
Who are all these fucking douchebags?
I now know why I don’t leave my house on the weekends.
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The stupid fucking manicurist just broke my $400 ring
And didn’t even say sorry.
“Did you hear there’s naked people on the sixth floor?”
—Overheard at the MOMA
I just walked between two buck naked ladies at the MOMA
One of them had a giant bush.
Dennis Rodman has got to be the ugliest man on the planet.
“If any other organization had done anything close to what the Church is being accused of, they’d be done! the Church is barely showing any contrition - for God’s sakes, look how sorry Domino’s was just for their shitty pizza! They had a bad sauce recipe, (and) they’ve been out there nonstop - ‘Oh, we’re so sorry. Here, have some Crazy Bread!’”
—JON STEWART, on The Daily Show. (via darklamb)
Carey Mulligan is the new Michelle Williams
“Today my son got a time-out for trying to go down the slide on a tricycle. As a father, I think I was supposed to do something other than high-five him, but that was the only thing that came to mind.”
——The Original Joe Fisher
Blah Blah Blah Elian Gonzalez Is a Puppet of the Cuban Government Blah Blah Blah
Motherfucker is fiiiiiiine.
“A romper suit is a one-piece garment worn by children and sometimes women.”
—Wikipedia. Think about this statement, ladies. (via natashavc)
Beach Balls →
beachballs.com
There are so many gems on this website, I don’t even know where to begin.
I just tried to watch Where the Wild Things Are
And lasted a whole 12 minutes before shutting it off.
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I just cried at the end of VH1's Tool Academy.
Go. Fuck. Yourself.
